Busy Days!

Ok so Tuesday I was late for my class but it's a good thing that we didn't have a lab! Then I went to work. I got to sleep in on Wednesday, but I didn't want to get out of bed. Then Thursday I had school again but I wasn't feeling all that great so I just went to my institute class. Then Friday I got to sleep in and again I didn't want to get out of bed. I also got paid on Friday which is nice, then I went to work. I got invited to a party at a friends house so I went there after work. Then Saturday got to sleep in and again I didn't want to get out of bed. I spent way to much time on the computer then I had plans to go to a ward activity and then I was invited over to a friends house in my ward, and I was also invited to a friends house to see all of my institute friends so I was triple booked for Saturday!! I ended up not going to the institute party.

I am happy though that the sun is out longer it was nice driving at 6:30pm with the sun still shinning. I can't wait for the smell of summer; and the summer storms; and the smell of the earth when it rains. I will also love it when it's warm and dry enough to go hiking!

Time and change again has been on my mind! I really do feel like I have lost the old me, again not like it's a bad thing it's actually a really good thing. But it still is kind of weirding me out a little. I guess it's just going to take some time getting used to the new me. Today is fast Sunday for my ward, and we are combined with the boys, so it should be a good lesson. I really don't want to go back to work on Monday, it's so lonely now that we are back to working alone; I hate it. But at least I don't have to work while conference is going on I get to watch all four sessions which is nice for once!

Also I have decided that I need another vacation. Lake Powell was good but after a disappointing Tuesday I feel that I need to get away again; so that maybe this time I can forget about the boy, and that he will be out of my head and this raw pain will go away, I thought I knew what this pain felt like, but apparently not since my heart is hurting so much worse than the last time; and it's weird because usually I can tell when a boy isn't interested in me as more than a friend, and I tend to stop liking him and I get over it; and I usually don't get hurt when I find out that he doesn't like me the same way that I like him. But I am stronger than I seem, I know that eventually the pain will go away and it will pass probably sooner than I expect it will; it will just take some time; I would really like to hide under my bed covers and stay there for two months; but what doesn't kill me will only make me stronger!

Spring Is Here!

Ok so I went to Lake Powell for spring break and had a blast! It was nice to get away from the city and life at home for a bit! I went with some of my friends in my student ward. We took a boat and went tubing, & wake boarding. It was a fun road trip, my friend Matt caught a duck and my friend Rachel got a really bad bruise on her back. I am just glad that no one died and that I didn't have to give CPR. At night it was so neat the moon wasn't out so the sky was filled with stars and you could see the stars in the water; and we got to see a lot of shooting stars! Another one of my friends fell out of her chair twice that was pretty funny! The water was cold though it was about 60 degrees, once you got used to it, it was nice; and it was above 80 degrees during the day! I didn't lose any weight which is a little disappointing; but at least I didn't gain anything, so I still have lost only 10lbs. I did get a nice tan and I didn't get sun burnt too bad!

So I went to the Draper Temple dedication it was nice. Church was good even though I was late because I was so sore and tired from Lake Powell. Church was shortened because of the Temple dedication it was kind of neat because in Relief Society we go to spend some time getting to know some of the girls that we didn't know. Then we had sacrament meeting; which was good, I didn't think that it would end so early though. Then I went over to a friends house after the dedication and we ate pizza and chocolate chip cookies; looked at pictures from Lake Powell and talked.

Then Monday I had work off so I got to go to my wards FHE it was at lot of fun. It was nice for once to have a Monday off and to be able to go to FHE. Then I went bowling with some friends in my ward; my scores were really good this time, I got 107 and then 111. So 111 is my new high score! Also I got asked a question that was worded wrong and things got way out of control; but everything got worked out, so things are good again.

All in all spring is finally here the birds are coming back the grass is green; the sun is out longer! I love the sun I can't wait for summer to come! I have been missing the long days and the warm summer nights!

Good Days!!

OK so I didn't go to the gym last Thursday shame on me. I didn't go because I was really tired and I didn't want the same thing to happen like last Thursday so I went home after work which was good. Friday I did go to the gym and it was nice I lost another 4lbs so all together I have lost 10lbs which makes me so happy!!

Then Saturday I went and got a lot of things done and I went to my friend Manelle's house for PI day and we just talked then a few of us went outside and got chased by Zombies on Rick's phone, I was kind of slow and couldn't keep up with everyone all the time but for the most part it was fun ( mostly the reason I couldn't keep up with everyone was because I had the wrong shoes on) then we went back to Manelle's house got some water and Jackie came over and so we talked for a bit longer then everyone went home.

Church was good today I got a lot out of the lesson in Relief Society and Sunday school. Sacrament Meeting was really good too, church seemed to go really fast and I didn't want it too I guess because I was really enjoying church today!!

So nothing bad happened this weekend and I am really happy that nothing did I just hope that nothing bad will happen when I go to Lake Powell with a few of my friends later this week. I know how to do CPR and rescue breathing but I don't want to do it unless I really have too!!

So Blessed!

Last Friday I went over to my friend Jaime's house and we had a lot of fun playing Imagine If and watching both of the Ghost Buster movies. Sunday was Stake Conference and I really enjoyed the talks that were given. Monday went to work then went bowling with friends in my ward!! Today I passed my written test in my first aid class, and now I have two more days of work this week and two days of work next week. Then off to Lake Powell with friends in my ward! Yea!

Also I got my tax return so I am buying a new camera!! Yea!! Now hopefully nothing bad will happen for the rest of this week. I probably will go to the gym tonight after work, and I really need to, since I didn't go last week at all. Shame on me.......but I went out with friends instead. I am so blessed; I am so grateful for my Heavenly Father, because things in my life could be much worse!

I have friends who care about me and I care about them. I have a family that supports me. I have a roof over my head. Heavenly Father answers my prayers and I know that he cares about me. I am more strong and confident than I ever have been in my life. School is going well. I don't have to work during General Conference, I get to watch all four sessions. I love going to church; and I love all my friends and family!! I would be nothing without my Heavenly Father!!

Time!!

Something that has been on my mind is time. Time seems to be moving so fast lately, and sometimes I would like it to slow down or just stop for a while. I guess that is why I have been feeling like I am losing my old self, and why I can't go back; because time has been pushing me forward and it has been changing me.

Also like I said in my first post of March.....not that I don't like the new me; cause I have been seeing things a little more clearly and I am more confident that I ever have been.

Although I am afraid that becoming this new me I will leave one of my friends behind because our friendship has been one sided every so often; and the more I try and involve her with all my new friends the more she doesn't like it. Even though she doesn't say anything to me, I can see it on her face or hear it in her voice. I don't want to lose her, so I will keep on trying and hope that one day she will come around.

So I guess that's why I have been feeling weirded out, or that something is missing is because of time passing by too quickly, and because I have been changing so fast lately.

I have some friends from the past that have kind of slipped through my fingers and I see them maybe once a year; but sometimes I would like to give them a good shake and ask WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?? But I guess things happen and change must come and time moves on.

So I will always be here for my friends no matter what happens, because I care about them; and their secrets are safe with me!

Test and Beautiful Day!

Today I had a lab test which I passed!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was so happy that I didn't have to go to work today!! So when I got home I took some pictures of the sky because the clouds were just gorgeous! So here are a few pictures I took!

I really like the sun light coming through this cloud!

So then later on I went to a friends bridal shower and then I went to Barnes and Noble with a good friend and got a book and hot chocolate, so all in all today was a good day and the weekend is here and that makes me even more happy and it's a good end to a good day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Visits and Testimony!

Sunday was pretty good I enjoyed fast and testimony meeting! Then I went home and my mom didn't have dinner ready..........so it's a good thing I ate something at the mingle after church. I then went to the fireside and I really enjoyed Elder Hales' talk, I stayed after a bit and talked with everyone in my ward that came to the CES fireside. I was invited over to Britty's place to watch a movie but since I hadn't had a full meal all day, and my sister and her husband came over for Sunday family dinner; I wanted to eat something and visit with my sister and brother in-law; cause the last time I got to visit with them was Christmas. So I went home and got to visit with them and eat food!!

Monday was a lot of fun I went bowling; my scores weren't so good though I got a 77 and then a 96. So better luck next Monday! Then all of us that went bowling, went to Dee's, and that was super fun; & when I got home I remembered who my friend Liz was in the murder mystery dinner, she was Mr. Fife. Tuesday for some reason I forgot to set my alarm and I didn't wake up until 12:20pm and my class starts at 11:00am; oh well good thing I don't have my test until tomorrow.

Then I went to work and since I worked on Saturday I get a day off this week and my day off is Thursday so I don't know what I am going to do on Thursday after school I have plans at 8pm; but what to do till then......well I will think of something. Today my sister came over to use the phone so she could pay her cell phone bill because she forgot to pay it on time. Also I found out that the 4th book of Fablehaven is coming out March 24th which makes me happy; because I thought it wasn't coming out until the summer!

Sometimes I worry about certin people in my family because they are having a hard time, and usually there is nothing I can do but pray for them and hope for the best. I wish though that there was something else or more that I could do for them. Well I guess the only other thing to do is try to be a better example to them; so I will continue to go to all of my church meetings; I know I will never lose my testimony, and I will keep trusting my Heavenly Father.

Thoughts!

Do you ever feel like you are losing your old self and becoming something new? Not that it is necessarily a bad thing, because change is good sometimes. But no matter how hard I try to go back, I find myself moving forward instead. I mean to say that I have not lost who I am or what I stand for, or what I want and believe in life. Well let me see if I can explain.......lately I've just been feeling like something is out of place......I guess. Well I usually read about 5 books at a time and I write in my journal regularly; but for some reason this year I have stopped reading my leisurely novels and I don't write in my journal as often as I used to! It's been weirding me out a little because I love to read; reading is one of my passions in life! I still read my scriptures and I have been reading more verses than I usually do; because I want to get through the Book of Mormon again and I want to read the Pearl of Great Price cover to cover.

Another thing is.....I have been in two accidents already this year and they were both within a month; and I almost got in another one when I ran that red light coming home from the gym; and that right there is not like me at all, because I don't get into accidents. Although I am so grateful to have a Heavenly Father that watches out for me, because I could have ran that red light and hit that van and I probably would have been seriously hurt or maybe even dead, or the person in the van could have been hurt or dead!

Even though I have been seeing the big picture a little better and Heavenly Father has been answering my prayers; and I have been trying to be a better person and friend, I feel like I should do more for my friends but whatever it is I can't seem to think of it or I must be overlooking it.

One of my best friends is having a hard time because her father has cancer and I haven't seen her in over 4 months, I have had family with cancer, my aunt (and she was one of my favorite aunt's) had bone marrow cancer and died from it, and one of my cousins had to go through chemo twice. So I feel her pain but I don't know what else to say to her other than that I am here for her, and I am praying for her, and I am sorry for her. Another friend of mine I have kind of neglected because she lives out of state and it's hard sometimes to know what to say; and sometimes when I can talk to her I find I don't have a whole lot to say, and it drives me a little crazy and I get upset with myself because I should have tonz of things to tell her.

Then another friend is going through a hard time because of personal reasons, and all I can do is say that I am there for this friend if they ever want to talk, because their secrets are safe with me. Another thing bothering me is that I feel like I am moving on and leaving one of my friends behind or that I am moving and she is just standing still; and I want to help her and I have tried....but I am running out of ideas, and I don't want to leave her behind; she has been one of my most truest and trusting friends that I probably will ever have. These are friendships I care deeply about.

And I want all my friends to know that no matter what happens I will always be here for them.